As Real As It Can Get

Now is the time to condense the internet. I think I mentioned before that the internet makes me happy. It does, but now, I’m not so sure that’s a good thing. In the wake of yesterday’s spirit of letting go, I’m beginning to rethink a lot of things. (Also, this post may be a little about Harry Potter, but not really. Just. Yeah. It’s my first day back into the world of the living, you have to give it some time before it completely disappears.)

Today I started reading my first book after the fandom–Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal by Christopher Moore. It’s the first of a whopping nine books in a pile that’s been building up since either last Christmas or my last birthday. It’s been fun, but I’ll admit that Bartholomew sounded a lot like Hagrid in my head before he became all philosophical. So yeah, the dregs are still there but not as intense as before.

Another, more pleasant leftover from the months of Harry Potter has been the clandestine development of my reading habits. I’m reading a lot quicker than I used to and now I actually consciously choose to read instead of going online or watching TV. Commitment looks good on me. Also, the weird subconscious memorization skills are bound to help in the Kas readings to come. But we go back to that books versus the computer thing.

I need to narrow down the internet. Bottom line is that there is a LOT of useless shiz out there that I continuously spend time on, social networking sites being at the top of that list and I don’t even have a Facebook account and I quit Tumblr. (I was actually considering returning after watching DH2 since I quit because of spoilers, but oh well.) I only have Twitter and Plurk and those are enough to keep me busy. I click a link and I am constantly redirected to fun stuff when I should be reading or writing or studying or being human in the world where I was meant to live.

I don’t know. I guess I just want to prove that it is possible to live a content and happy life without spending everyday online. I’m not leaving it–I’m not stupid and I still want to be alive in the world somehow and come on, is quitting the internet even possible–but I am going to do my best to stick to the stuff that’ll help me live my life. I’m seventeen! Whatever crap my mother says about me preferring to stay in my room, I do recognize that I have a life to live outside this screen.

(Skip this and go back to it after reading my rant. Or not, your choice. Random side story about my mother: She was just saying that right after dinner, in that annoying I’m-not-happy-with-how-you-turned-out, you-looked-so-cute-when-you-were-two-but-now-you-are-my-least-favorite-child, PMS-ing way. And for the first time, I actually told my brother about how much I resented that, let myself rant for a few minutes while I was supposed to be helping him with homework. Then we heard a crash and a shout from the kitchen. Apparently, my mother hit her foot hard on the bicycle we keep there. It’s nothing life-threatening or anything, she’s all right, but damn, karma, you sure do know your thing.)

I want to remind myself of the things that are beautiful about the real world on my return. Children sleeping peacefully in their parents’ arms, a catchy song from a promising band on the radio, a sky with a thousand colors at sunset. This is the world that I knew. Yes, there are so many beautiful things about the internet as well and it’s actually made me appreciate the world better; I plan to hold on to those. I plan to keep watching awesome videos on YouTube, enjoy the work of a thousand talent artists on deviantArt, and to keep on doing less honorable things like pirate movies and read crazy fanfiction. Those are what I consider beautiful.

However, from this moment on, I solemnly swear not to let myself get carried away with random useless shiz. Sometimes I know what I’m doing is random and useless but I still carry on. No more of that! I need more control in my life, more time spent with real people, more ways to express myself without the need to tweet it.

As a closing remark to this rant, today I also caught a part of the movie The Secret Garden on HBO and there was a scene where the girl was learning how to jump rope and she couldn’t get it and I almost laughed at her until I realized: holy shit, can I still jump rope? When was the last time I had actually SEEN real children jump rope? I do not want my children to be ignorant of jump ropes and jackstones and sungka and sipa even if they’re as physically inept as I am. Call me traditional, but never close-minded. I just want to be able to live with the stuff I knew as well as the stuff that’s yet to come. Change is inevitable, yes, but is it such a crime to hold on to what I think is worth it?

(I just read this again and realized that this may just be my ebook aversion reaching a whole new level, but hey, it’s a rant and it’s been written and I intend to follow this through. So yeah. Marp.)

On the Harry Potter front: It’s been pretty chill. Silently exploring the realms of a new ship borne from my hatred of Ginny. Well, new for me, who hast known nothing but Dramione. It’s a bit tedious to look through since I don’t have a lot of sources for this one. I’ve grown so used to getting my Dramione fanfic fix from LiveJournals and Tumblrs, I’m not used to delving through quality on my own. Also, I doubt there’s as big a fanbase for Harry/Luna as their is for Dramione; they don’t even have a catchy portmanteau yet. (Haruna, Larry, Haluna, Lurry, Hurry, Hurna, Lunry…) Ah well. I wanted the real world, and here it is. As real as it can get on the internet, at least.


About shaniquasparkles
Fangirl writes. Has never written fanfiction. Pretends to write six-word stories.

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